Go here, everyone. It’s hot.
Filed under: adoption, fatherlessness, kids, life, solo life , adoption, adoption reform
O Solo Mama
Single momhood, adoption, middle age. All together now.
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fascinating. I had to blog about it
I went there and commented. Most of the comments seemed quite reasonable, to my surprise:-) One thing I question that I did not mention was the emphasis on placing kids with natural relatives. This sounds good but often is not the best idea.This is one reason I am reluctant to support “family preservation” at all costs.
I know too many weird stories of being raised in families where big sister or auntie were really the mother, or others where relatives were truthful but resentful of having to raise a niece or grandchild. And then there are those families that are seriously dysfunctional going back generations. Sometimes this can work, but I do not see it as always being the first choice. Another factor is that some surrendering mothers did not want their kid raised by relatives; part of the point of surrender was to save the child from how they were raised. I think this factor needs to be considered as well.
Interesting observation. It also irks me somewhat when grandparents are automatically assumed to be available to raise a child. Even if they agree to it, this does not always spell one big happy family. This arrangement can work, especially if there is some $$ (e.g., mom goes to grad school while parents raise the child, but with no secrets–I’ve seen that) and I’ve seen grandparents chafing under the unexpected responsibility too.
Odd….the post written by me was from a Yahoo Answers question from ages ago. This appears to be some kind of collection of old posts, mostly from Yahoo.
Really? Well, they haven’t let in the newest replies either. Thanks for the tip-off.
Weird.
Too weird.
Yeah, well, so much for hot!! Derivative abounds.